Floor Number Eighteen
by JhaniiAllii
Summary: Elizabeth and William meet in a lift. If you can even call it meet. Correction: Elizabeth and William stand awkwardly next to each other in a lift for weeks... And this is what they think about it. It was a random idea that turned into a weird one shot that turned into a poorly written story. You're all welcome.
1. Week Number One

**A/N:**

**Hello! I know... I'm BACK! *blows party popper* but I'll come back to that later in another update... of another story (Yes T'W'S is still going and is in editing stages. Soon. I promise.) Anyway, as for this... Don't ask. I was supposed to be finishing Mush's Bday FF (Don't worry. It's only 26 days late) and doing homework, then this happened. It has no plot. It has no actual ending. This story achieves nothing. But I like it so tough. **

**I think I have being watching far too much 'How I Met Your Mother' repeats and 'HipsterHood' (Living on the wildside) and if you watch any of those, it will soon become apparent what I mean. Anyway, enjoy. It would be nice to know what you think because this is something of an experiment with a new writing style... REVIEW!**

**Love you all and will get back to your PMs and whatnot soon.**

**-Ally.**

* * *

_Okay William... Come one. Breathe. _

_First day in the office of our new job. We can do this. _

_I mean, it's really not that big of a deal. _

_Yes, this may be the only chance you ever have to prove to your parents that you can be trusted and left in charge of an entire company. Yes, this might be the only chance you ever have to show Richard your family that you are capable of holding a conversation with strangers and have people skills. _

_It may be all of these things... but not a big deal. Definitely not a big deal._

The lift doors finally opened and I stepped in before pressing the appropriate floor button. I made sure no one else was waiting as I hit the 'close doors'.

_Man, this building has a lot of floors... And I bet these floors contain a lot of people... All people that you are going to have to rule over. _

_Rule? Did I honestly just say rule. How stupid and pretentious does that sound? _

_Is pretentious even the right word I was looking for? And the panic begins. _

_Nope. No panicking Will. Not today. We are going to take this like a man. _

_Step One: Do not get fired. _

_Oh wait... You can't really get fired when you run the company. _

_Step Two: Try not to fire other people. _

_That's better. People tend to get quite pissy when you fire them on the first day. And it's probably best not to piss people off on your first day... Which we can do by- _

_Step Three: Not coming off as an arrogant, conceited bastard. _

_Which I am told I do. A lot. Then there's- _

_Step Four: Try and make some friends. Or at least some acquaintances. Just find some people who won't print off a picture of your face and then stick it on the dart board in the staff room. I mean, that would be nice. For once. _

_That would be very nice in- _

"Hold It!" A voice shouted from far down the corridor. "HOOOLLLLLLDDDD IIIITTTT!"

_Hold what? Why is someone shouting in the- _

_Oh crap. Are they talking to me? _

A young woman ran towards the lift, waving her arms frantically at me from behind the closing doors.

"HOLD THE LIFT!"

_Oh right. Shit. _

I jammed my briefcase between the doors at last minute. The lift beeped and the doors opened allowing the young woman into the lift. As she walked in she looked up at me, about to say something, but instead gave me a small smile and blushed.

She straightened out her coat with one hand and pressed for her floor before brushing a loose strand of hair behind her ear and staring down at her shoes.

The lift doors finally closed and we began to fly up the side of the tower.

_Wow. She's hot. _

_Did I really just say that? Yes. I did. _

_She's hot. _

_I mean, brunette isn't normally my type but- _

_Hey. She's two floors down from me. If my knowledge serves me right that's the editorial floor. _

_So she's an editor... Or a journalist? Doesn't really look like the receptionist type... _

_So she's intelligent. Nice. _

_Her hair's a bit messy though for first thing in the morning. How can your get that messed up by half seven...? In the morning. _

_Then again, it's not really messy as much as the curls are just falling out of her bun. _

_Perhaps you William are just to used to seeing prim and perfected woman. That could be the problem here. _

_She looks like she's ran. Her coffee's all sloshed down the side of her cup and, actually, her hair is kind of wind swept. _

_Starbucks. She likes coffee. And has once been to Starbucks. _

_Two things we have in common. Bingo. _

_Though she is quite short and I normally go for tall. _

_Wait- I normally go for tall? What? _

_FITZWILLIAM DARCY YOU ARE NOT THINKING OF HITTING IT OFF WITH THE WOMAN IN THE LIFT! _

_This is what happens when you try to replace your love life with your work life. You start getting all feelsy about a random woman in a lift. _

_Note to self: You need to get laid. And soon. _

_But she looks like a genuinly nice person. A genuinly nice person with really super hot legs and a gorgeous curvy body. _

_And you just don't get that often. _

_Her eyes are all hazel as well. All dark and wild and passionate and- _

_'Kay. That was weird. _

_Her dress even has little hexagons on it. How can you hate a person who can wear a dress covered in mathematical patterns and still look hot. _

_It would be like trying to skin a micro pig for pork crackling. _

_Against the laws of humanity. _

_I wonder if her eyes are dark or light brown? They had little amber flecks in them when she walked in. _

_Or maybe that was just the light. _

_Am I staring? _

_Shit she's looking at me. She's looking at me weirdly. She's looking at me like she knows I've just spent the past 15 floors thinking about her. Look casual Will, casual. _

_Okay... She's looking at the floor again. Sweet escape. _

_Maybe I should say something... Like ask her her name. _

_Maybe she doesn't even work her and she's just visiting someone. _

_What if this is the only time I ever see her and I've wasted it thinking about how hot she is. _

_What if- _

***ding* "Floor Number Eighteen" **

She glanced a smile in my direction and then walked out of the lift as the doors opened.

_Damn... too late. _


	2. Week Number Two

**Author's Note:**

**Hello. It's me. Again... I am going to try and make this quick (I know I say that every time and never do) BUT I do have some questions to answer. I didn't have time to reply to reviews before posting this so I'll answer the most frequently answered questions here. Firstly, is this going to be a full story? Meh. If you mean more than one chapter, YEAH! If you mean a story with actual plot bunnies and stuff then...yeah-nope. This is more of me experimenting with different techniques and humour. It's like my internal muse I guess. I just think and type, no more. No thought. No plot. Are we going to get a chapter from Lizzie's POV? YEAH! The story will alternate from chapter to chapter. So chap 1 will be Will's POV and 2 Lizzie's 3 Will's, 4 Lizzie's, so on and so forth. This chapter is from Lizzie's POV in case you didn't guess :D Are they going to get stuck in a lift together? I know what each chapter is going to consist of because (For some reason) I have written ahead of myself. No, probably not... Do you want them too though? I guess that could happen... Thoughts? Is Lizzie there to visit Jane or Charlotte? Nope... She definitely works there. Does she know Darcy is her boss? No... They don't know who each other are except that they both possibly work there. Although Darcy is her higher he isn't technically her 'boss'. Different floors are different departments of the business. He is literally just the guy who runs everything and owns the company. The big CEO. Just to clear that up. Does Ally appreciate the fact the all her reviewers are awesome and that she loves them very much and is lucky to have the,? Yeah. She does ;)**

**-Ally.**

* * *

_Things to do: _

_Try and get through the day alive. That is particularly important._

_Try not to pour your coffee over Charlotte's head when she __does her world famous imitation __(Which she will do) of a drunken you from last Friday night. Just take it on __the__ chi… and then spike her tea with Vodka and watch the fireworks begin. Bitch just try and mess with me. _

_Try and-_

_THE LIFT THE LIFT! TRY AND MAKE IT TO THE LIFT!_

The lift doors opened around the corner and a man stepped inside.

_Hey look, its lift guy again._

_Haven't seen you in a while. Well, a week._

_Then again I only use the lift once a week at this time so..._

_Do you think he gets in the lift this early each Monday._

_Man that's harsh. What __saddo__ would get into a lift to go to work at half seven each morning._

_Oh wait. You would. _

_Thank you again Lady C for your excellent rescheduling. Really __fricking__ appreciate it._

_I can't even watch Jeremy Kyle any more._

_What kind of person makes a woman go to work without a cup of tea and at least fifteen minutes of Jeremy Kyle? I should talk to the union about this. _

_Just try not to look like a retard running for a lift this time Lizzie. That would be helpful right now._

I stepped into the lift and took my place next to him.

_Wow. He's hot. Still very hot._

_Like he-is-so-hot-he-could-spontaneously-burst-into-fla mes hot._

_That doesn't even make any sense... _

_Yes Lady C. This is what happens when you deprive a woman of her tea. Coffee can only replace it for a while my friend, only for a while..._

The lift doors slowly shut and we started up the building.

_Talk about tall, dark and handsome though._

_He is REALLY tall._

_And superhot._

_And... on his way to the top floor. Management. Nice._

_That would explain the briefcase. And the long, sassy looking coat. _

_And the suit that looks like it cost about the same price as my apartment. Including everything in it._

_But hey- who am I to judge. The suit looks __sexy__ nice on him._

_He has really nice hair as well... I need to find another word for nice. I use that too much._

_Note to self: Look up synonyms for nice. _

_Nice..._

_Commendable..._

_Amiable..._

_Delightful..._

_Attractive..._

_Becoming-_

_Oh yeah. Becoming. His hair is very becoming. Mission Accomplished. _

_And they hired me to edit other people's articles. Wow Lizzie. Just wow._

…

_His luxurious soft, ringlet locks glowed the __colours__ of autumn under the-_

_Another word for soft._

_Comfortable..._

_Silky..._

_Cozy..._

_Gentle-_

_Under the gentle glare of the lights adorning the lift walls. A lone curl caressed the back of his collar screaming of its desire to have Lizzie's fingers run through its-_

_Okay. Too far. _

_Let's pretend we just did not write a __fanfiction__ about you stroking the random man in the lifts hair._

_He will never know. _

_Unless he is a mind reader...!_

_Ohmygod__ I'm in a lift with a mind reader. _

_Shit __shit__shit__._

_There's only one way to know. _

_IF YOU ARE A MIND READER NOD ONCE!_

I slowly peeked behind my curtain of hair.

_Nope, still staring at his shoes thinking. Sweet. _

_That was a close escape._

_..._

_Maybe I should say something... He seems like a __nice__ commendable man. _

_A man I could get along with __and then maybe he would let me touch his hair__._

_What should I say though?_

_"Oh hey there sir, I was just thinking about how goddamn beautiful you are and writing internal fantasies about touching your hair when I thought- we would make great friends! Now let me be your best friend for life! 'KayThanksBye?"_

_That would go down well. _

_Are we weird? Yup. Very weird._

_He has really nice eyes as well. _

_They're all emerald-y and __smoulder-y__ and-_

_STOP __STOP__._

_I should make a witty joke or pun about being in a lift. _

_Witty jokes and puns have a 100% success rate of making friends. Honestly._

_It's better than asking about the weather. _

_Think of a joke, think of a lift related joke..._

_Okay, think of a lift related joke that doesn't involve someone farting and-_

***ding* "Floor Number Eighteen"**

_Poop. Too late. _


	3. Week Number Six

**Author's Note:**

**Well hi guys. Sorry I've been away so long, the last few weeks/months whatever, of school were crazy and I just didn't have the time to write and edit and... live really. BUT I AM BACK. HOPEFULLY. WHO KNOWS? I'M TRYING. This story is going to have around seven chapters so, seriously, don't worry about me finishing half way through. I like to finish what I start. Also, I kind of wrote this over the period of... However long it has been since I LAST updated this but I can't be bothered to edit it so, I have no idea what its going to be like. However, gold star for effort. Reviews maybe...? For old times sake?  
**

**-Ally.**

* * *

_Week Number Six_

_C'mon... C'mon._

_We __canNOT__ be late today! _

_It's- Oh shit._

_It's twenty-five past seven. _

_This is ridiculous. We're going to be late... We have five minutes to get to the lift and we're still stuck behind the same old... old..._

_OLD PEOPLE SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO DRIVE!_

_There... I said it. These are my thoughts, I can say what I like._

_No one will know, right...? _

_Unless there's a mind reader around-_

_No William,_ w_e've been through this before, THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS MIND READERS._

_But that's what Bella thought before she met Edward._

_Did you just bring Twilight into this?_

_Maybe I did…_

_I'm ashamed of you….I really am._

_Ashamed of me? How dare you- NOPE. YOU'RE DOING IT AGAIN WILLIAM._

_WE'RE TALKING TO OURSELF. IN THIRD PERSON. THAT'S REALLY NOT NORMAL._

_I GOOGLED IT._

…

_What was I even thinking?_

_Oh right, now we have FOUR minutes to get to the lift. _

_We have to be there first... We're always there first._

…

_Seriously old lady. Can you just move along now!_

_Old people, you cannot complain about young people driving to quickly when PEOPLE ARE OVER TAKING US! WALKING PEOPLE!_

_That woman is literally walking past us-_

_Jesus... She's a fast walker..._

_Slow down lady. Where are you going?_

_Maybe she's late just like us... Maybe there is a man waiting or her in a lift someplace else-_

_Why are we even thinking about this?_

_I seriously worry about you sometimes Will..._

_Wait. Did I just refer to myself in third person again and HOLY CRAP we have three minutes. _

_And we are still stuck in traffic. _

_I guess we could just-_

_FITZWILLIAM DARCY WE ARE NOT JUMPING THE BARRIER AND ILLEGALLY DRIVING ON THE PAVEMENT JUST SO WE CAN AWKARDLY STAND NEXT TO A WOMAN WE DO NOT EVEN KNOW IN A LIFT._

_Even though we do know her..._

_Despite what Caroline says._

_I mean, what does she know...? She thought faggots were literal cow balls in gravy._

_Cows don't even have balls._

_They're female... Why would a female have __testis__?_

…

_..._

_Stop imagining a cow with balls Will. Stop that right now. _

I drove through the gates and swung the car into my usual space.

_You don't need to speak to someone to know them anyway so Caroline can just shut her mouth._

_I know that she walks to work... or possibly catches the bus._

_She gets a coffee from Starbucks each morning on her way to work... Which Starbucks though?_

_Where does she travel from?_

_We have literally been to every Starbucks in a five meter radius and no one knows her... Which ones did we miss out?_

_Not that we __interrogated__ the young suffering-from-sever-acne workers in each one because that would be stalker-__ish__._

_We may be many things William, but we are not stalkers._

_Nope. Definitely not stalkers._

_We could have looked for her files in the office, like Richard suggested, but we didn't._

_Because that would be weird..._

_Though it is really tempting..._

_No. Too far William. Too far._

_Plus anything on that file we could find out for ourselves with our super __sleuth__ skills._

…

_Or we could just talk to her?_

_And say what?_

_I don't know... Ask her about the weather..._

_What. While she laughs at us and our poor conversation skills?_

_The anxiety is really not worth it._

_ARE YOU KIDDING ME WILL?! HAVE YOU SEEN THAT WOMAN!_

_She is worth it William... She is worth every ounce of the raw unadulterated stress-_

_And we're back in third person. _

…

_You know what Will. We should just do it._

_After spending the past five weeks standing next to her we should just...SAY something. _

_What do we have to lose? Ask her out. Grab a coffee with her from the mysteriously located Starbucks. _

_Just do something._

I broke into a sprint towards the lift.

_RUN WILL! RUN FOR YOUR LADY!_

_IGNORE THE FACT YOU ARE NOW OFFICIALLY TWO MINUTES LATE!_

_IGNORE THE FACT THAT YOUR ANXIETY IS PROBABLY GOING TO KICK IN ANY SECOND SOON!_

_JUST RUN!_

I ran into the lift, out of breath, and looked around.

_She's not here... Why is she not here...?_

_Has she already gone up? Did we miss her? _

_BUT WE WERE GOING TO TALK AND GRAB A COFFE AND GET MARRIED, BUY A HOUSE TOGETHER, HAVE A BOY AND TWO GIRLS WITH A LITTLE DOGGY. _

…

_You need to get out more. _

_And laid. Again, that is something we need to start working on. _

I walked out of the lift and back into the hallway.

_Where is she, where is she, where is she?! _

_Lift girl... where are you? _

_I bet she's already up there. Flaunting around on Floor Eighteen... doing whatever it is she actually does. _

_I bet she's- _

_Oh god. _

The sound of clicking heels against the tiles caught my attention.

_Don't panic. Don't panic. Don't panic. _

A petite brunette dressed in a black dress and office shirt turned around the corner and began to make her way towards the lift clutching a wad of papers and notebooks, a black coat and a Starbuck's Coffee.

_Act natural William. Natural. _

_Walk into the lift- That's it. Move your legs like so- perfect. _

_Okay. Stand still. Don't fidget- NO DON'T RUN YOUR FINGERS THROUGH YOUR HAIR. _

_But I'm so stressed. And now I'm going to look like a crazy person. _

_We just walked in a full circle in and out of the lift and- She's coming. _

Lift girl stepped into the carriage and took her place next to me. She smiled up at me briefly before looking away quickly.

_Oh my…_

_She's- Whoa._

_She's even prettier than I remembered… And her hair._

_She's done something to her hair and- WE'RE STARING. _

_ABORT ABORT ABORT._

I snapped my head forward and stared at the shutting lift doors.

The lift slowly started to rise and I could see the dial from the corner of my eye creeping towards floor one.

_We have seventeen floors William._

_Only seventeen._

_Say something._

I opened my mouth and turned slightly towards her. Slowly she looked up at me, that smile still playing on her lips and a spark dancing through her eyes. I gulped and turned back to the doors, feeling like something was literally choking me, preventing my words from forming.

_Well… That went well._

_Wait. She has a Starbucks cup._

_They put your name on the cup right? _

_THAT MEANS HER NAME WILL BE ON THE CUP._

_And searching her name on the office database would be much easier than by physical description….Just saying._

I leaned back on my heels to try and read the tiny scrawl now clear on the cup.

_Ben…..Dover…._

_I don't get it. _

_She doesn't look much like and Ben..._

_That's a boy's name right? _

_MAYBE SHE GETS SOMEONE ELSE TO BUY HER COFFEE?_

_That would explain why no Starbucks seems to recognise her…_

_Who would buy you coffee every morning?_

_I'd buy her coffee every morning and-_

_Oh lord maybe she has a boyfriend that buys her coffee every morning…_

_Realistically I can't see how a woman like that is single._

_Damn._

_Maybe you should stop thinking about a load of crap William and just ask her… I mean, you only have 10 floors left- WAI. WHAT. TEN FLOORS._

_Okay…okay… don't panic. _

_Use your manly powers William._

_You are the son of George Thomas Darcy of Pemberley._

_He was the son of Thomas Phillip Darcy of Pemberley_

_He was the son of Phillip Henry Darcy of Pemberley._

_And he was the son of- POINT BEING we are from a race of strong men._

_Wooing the ladies is like a sixth sense to us…_

_At least it should be._

_Stop being a weakling._

_Man up boy!_

I cleared my throat and she turned to me again. This time there was a blush in her cheeks.

_Okay. And we're going to do it._

"_Um…"_

_We're doing it._

"_I-"_

_*_**Ding* " Floor Number Ten"**

_WAIT WHAT NO THIS WAS NOT AGREED FLOOR NUMBER TEN SINCE WHEN NO WHO WHY WHAT IS THIS WHAT IS LIFE HOW DARE SOMEONE ELSE USE THIS LIFT WHEN I AM CLEARLY TRYING TO WOO THIS PRETTY LADY TELL ME WHO LET ME FIRE YOU._

Lift girl looked just as shocked as I did as the lift doors opened to reveal a young, handsome, tanned man leaning against the wall, flexing his muscles like he had just left a Hollister photo shoot rather than an office at HALF SEVEN IN THE MORNING.

"Hey babe." He said directly to lift girl, waggling his eyebrows in what he must think is a seductive way. "How'ya doin'?"

WHAT THE FUCK.

WHO THE FUCK IS HE?

WHAT THE FUCK IS HE DOING HERE?

WHY DO YOU KEEP SAYING FUCK?

STOP SAYING FUCK.

I CAN'T HELP IT.

Fuck- Shit- Fuck.

Lift girl squirmed and reached for the lift buttons but tanned guy was one step ahead of her and had one foot in the way of the door, preventing it from closing.

_Wait… She's knows this prick?_

_Just look at him. _

_Ergh. He's orange is making my eyes hurt._

"I've been calling you all week and you haven't picked up babe… I miss you." He winked and stepped closer.

_All week? It's Monday. Aren't you a smart little shit._

_Are they… Dating?_

_She. Is dating a guy like THAT._

_I mean, I'm not one to judge but-_

_WHAT?_

_He must have one very- _

_You know what. I'm not even going there._

_Don't even go there William. Just don't._

"Oh…My phones been dead and I've been a bit bogged down with deadlines and stuff so…" She hurried, looking down at her bag, fidgeting_. _

"How about we go for a coffee to catch up? Or…we could go somewhere more" He looked up at me and then back at her with a grin "Private."

_Are there cameras in here? _

_If I just lash out right now and punch him will they know?_

_Wait. _

_I'm my own boss._

_I can't fire myself._

Lift girl looked at him exasperated. I can see the blush in her cheeks from here. She muttered an "okay" and then slowly made her way out of the lift. The tanned shit stood up and gave her this disgustingly dirty smile and stalked down the corridor with her in toe. Just before the doors closed, taking her from my reach once more, she turned around and gave me this kind of helpless smile as if to say goodbye or something. And then, the doors where closed and she was gone.

…_._

…_._

…_._

…_._

_Well._

_That wasn't very pleasant._

…

_I wonder if he works here…_

_Maybe I can release a bit of my rage when I FIRE HIM._

_You can't fire a man on the basis that he's dating a girl you don't know at all but think is hot._

_Erm… If your name is William Darcy you can._

…

_You raise a good point young one._

_But still-_

***Ding* " Floor Number Eighteen"**

_Hmph. Maybe next week._


End file.
